Such a thing...

I often find myself giving up something that is adequate to pursue the possibility of more than adequacy. Like the little girl walking down a path picking stones, I am afraid that I will be at the end of the path in my search for the largest stone, only to find myself holding a smaller stone than what I originally had. But, then again, if I was always content with what I had and turned a blind eye to everything else, I might find myself to be blissfully ignorant (or ignorantly blissful).

I know exactly what I'm looking for in life, but I don't know what it will look like. It's just a conviction that I have, a feeling. And I fear that I won't see it or pursue it during my short stay in life. [There's been a lot of death in my life lately, and I can't help but be selfish and think about myself and those around me.]

Ripple Effect

It's amazing what a little kindness can do. I know that everyone's heard about that "ripple effect" of how one action can go so far, but there are so many things that we do inadvertently and never give any thought to.

Without knowing it, there are people in my life, who have completely changed the way I look at things.

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Lately, thoughts of "nature vs nurture" and "fate vs free will" have been floating around in my head (along with all the other things that I've been consumed by). With both of these ideas, there is a weird balance of comfort and fear. There is comfort in knowing that you have choices, but also a great fear that your choices may bring undesirable consequences for you and others. There is also comfort in feeling that your fate and nature aren't your responsibility, but the fear that you have no choice as to where that fate will take you can leave you feeling helpless.

Optimism, I think, is a way for humans to cope with the fact that if they were to truly take everything they see at face value, they would see no reason to live. I'm not saying that there aren't beautiful things in life, I'm just saying that without optimism or faith, the ugly things would have the ability to tarnish beauty.

[By the way, I am sitting in Giesel right now, and a bird just landed outside of the window and "dropped a deuce". I wonder where it landed.]